Wednesday, March 08, 2017

The Blonde Girl in the Business Suit

I'm sitting in a coffee shop right now—the Brewed Awakening on Dewdney, the one they [the cool people] call Brewedney. It's 2:01, which is normally not a time I'd usually find myself in a coffee shop all alone, but Barclay has the day off (as soon as Sullivan found out his dad wasn't going to work today, he asked if the two of them could go to the guitar store together this afternoon, and why would I discourage that?).

I got here about fifteen minutes ago. I snagged the last available table, which felt lucky, and as I sat down and opened my laptop, I glanced over and noticed the woman at the table next to me—a blonde in a business suit and thick-rimmed glasses sitting with a group of men in business suits and thick-rimmed glasses. At first I thought she caught my eye because she bears a striking resemblance to Scarlett Johansson, but suddenly I realized that I recognized her from real life, too. I only had to think for a few seconds more before I came up with it: she was one of the actual PR students from that time I pretended to be a PR student so I could get backstage at the Junos. I was running the media room and she was driving the winners around backstage in a go-cart. We both had arm injuries (I'd sustained mine the night before, when two drunk men were hugging each other and fell on top of me—please tell me you remember all of this?*) and we were both stressed to the max because the whole thing was a lot more intense than we'd anticipated (especially me, being a complete and total imposter—I wonder if she knew?). We bonded over our shared stress, our shared injuries, and our shared Michael Buble experiences (he was the host that year). I haven't seen her since. I should go over and say hi. I probably won't.

Seeing her makes me feel all happy and wistful and nostalgic. That weekend was funny. I used to think about it all the time, but now it feels like it happened to someone else, in a TV show I saw once a long time ago. Probably because it happened pre-Sullivan, when I was living in the Village and getting up to all kinds of shenanigans, things I have neither time nor energy nor babysitting money for these days.

But there she is. She still exists in this city. She's gotten a little older (about four years older, by my estimation), and she looks very professional and happy. She's, like...I'm trying to put my finger on it...proof that that other version of myself still exists too. Does that make sense? (I don't make sense, sometimes.)

I really should say hi. But it'll be weird if she doesn't remember me. A compromise: if I catch her eye, I'll smile at her.

Nevermind, she's gone now. Left while I had my head down.

Oh well, she's still out there. Maybe I'll see her again in another four years, and maybe then she'll remind me of this quiet afternoon, writing in a coffee shop, and I'll feel all happy and wistful and nostalgic over it.

PS: Right as I hit Publish, another familiar person walked in: my manager from when I was a cashier at Staples. I do not feel any level of nostalgia or wistfulness over that.

*In case you don't, click here.


  1. I totally feel like this too! When my business life taps me on the shoulder from wayyyyy (3 years) in the past and is like "oh hey hi, we're still here, business and you?" And I'm all "raising humans, cleaning up cheerios and doing oven experiments." And then they always look at me to see if I'm serious or not...

    1. Hahahaha it's bizarre isn't it?? Just bizarre.

  2. I beg to differ with you. I still believe you are getting up to all kinds of crazy shenanigans that you have time and energy for! And ones where you don't need babysitting money because you either do them when your men are sleeping or with Sully! I read your blog, I know!

    1. Hahahah well I don't think I'll ever not do anything at all, that's true. But there was a time where I could be a bit more...reckless about it? You know?

  3. "I used to think about it all the time, but now it feels like it happened to someone else, in a TV show I saw once a long time ago." loved this post, but also this line in particular. so real.


Say anything you want. It doesn't even have to be relevant.